Staying Grounded in Humility

Jan 14, 2026

My dad was a union bricklayer for over 50 years so my family was middle class. There wasn’t much we didn’t have when I was a kid. We always had food on the table, lots of clothes, bikes, vacations, the whole shabang. It wasn’t until I was on my own that I truly came to understand the concept of gratitude.

Kicked out of the house at 17, I learned very quickly what it was like to have nothing. For weeks on end, I ate powdered mashed potatoes for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, and I only had the clothes on my back for a spell because my roommate gave all my shit away when I got arrested in 1976 (that’s a great story but not for now). Thankfully, I worked my way out of a really bad situation but I became grateful for food and warmth, and clean clothes.

In 1978, I married a man with two toddlers and became an instant mother. Being a mom was the most important job I’ve ever held. I loved school conferences and football games. I loved having my sons’ friends over (I was the cool mom) and I loved the lessons we learned from each other. I even loved their mother who was often difficult to work with, but I’ll be forever grateful to her for allowing me to raise her sons to manhood.

My ex’s ex and I disagreed a lot, but we loved each other. Here we are pretending to fight.

Ten years ago, I weighed 335 lbs and walking was extremely difficult. But when I started Weight Watchers, I forced myself to wake at 5am every morning and take a walk. Every step was painful, but how dare I complain? Thoughts of soldiers coming home without legs and the excruciating pain they must surely endure kept me motivated enough to push beyond my own pain and accomplish my goal. It was the gratitude of having healthy legs that helped me lose over 75 lbs in a year.

After losing a bunch of weight, I was able to walk in the Redwoods

When my mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, I prayed that when her time came, she would be taken quickly and completely, minimizing any suffering she might have and reuniting her with all who loved her. I am grateful that a 2-hour visit to the hospital for pain turned into an untreatable cancer that would steal her away in just 2 weeks.

Sam and I enjoy watching Master Chef, but last week it occurred to me that while we were intrigued over the placement of a flower petal on a steak, people all over the world are struggling to find enough food to sustain themselves and their families. How fucking privileged am I? Sometimes gratitude sneaks up on you in moments of deep shame.

I’m a keen observer and follow the system of common sense that requires thinking and not judging. I also follow the Golden Rule that was shoved down my throat as a child. They, too, make common sense because human beings need each other whether we like it or not. Having money doesn’t make you rich and coveting power just means you’re weak, so I’m grateful to have a fair sense of humility in my life.

Gratitude comes in all shapes and sizes, but today, as a 67-year-old woman inching toward finality, I know that Gratitude is the key to my happiness.